Navarro Wept; or How I Didn't make Ink Master season 3

Well the verdict is in. I didn't make it for season 3 of Ink Master. As if you couldn't tell by the title of this blog right ?

I'm not bummed out in the least bit. In fact I'm pretty relieved. Now some might jump to say that's just some sort of bravado to cushion the blow of not getting picked. They couldn't be more inaccurate.

Filming would have left me out of work for a while. Up to 8 whole weeks. Right in the heart of tax return season. For any of you lay folk not hip to the jive of the tax return season, fat pocket ballers, let me tell you; this time of year is Christmas for the blue collar tattoo artist. I'm literally working 6-7 days a week to support the influx.

Besides additional income, I would also be missing my girlfriend's art show coming up at the Russian Lady in Hartford, CT on April 4th ( hint hint folks ). I'd miss out on the Brimfield Antique fair, which I attend regularly 2 to 3 times a year. Easter with my family. On and on and on. It wasn't some luxurious life I'd be galavanting away to live, it was hard work, living with strangers, at the off chance I MIGHT make some money in the long run.

But above all else the one thing I'm missing out on, that I will not regret ever getting to witness, is the shit talking and mouth running of the Internet's ageless sages of wisdom, regarding the sanctity of tattooing and how it doesn't belong on TV !

That's sad isn't it. Knowing that I might be persona non grata in some tattoo circles. Mainly the holier than thou art American traditional crowd. Now I'm not downing all of them or the style. I wear mostly traditional tattoos myself, I do some myself, and I regularly make art work in a bastardized traditional style. Some of my closest compadres in the tattoo community, mainly the boys at Liberty Tattoo in Berlin,CT, are traditional tattooers ( yes that was another plug ). But many, based on blogs Ive read or comments I've seen lead me to believe the consensus is tattoos and TV are not good bed fellows. Instead of analyzing the motive and actions of the artist on TV the just condemn the whole crowd.

I can see the logic. I myself had an online run in with Ink Master Season 2 alum Kay Kutta. The former felon and prison taught tough guy very clearly cross contaminates . He touches his ink bottles with blood soiled gloves and places them down on his sterile field. Now this is fine and dandy if you wish to throw out full bottles of ink for every customer, but lets face it he didn't do that. I called him out via Instagram. He was less then thrilled. He let me know I was a " cock sucking groupie " that " hate is a blood borne pathogen " and that I should send him my girlfriend so he can fuck her. What a classy fella.

So with characters like that I can sympathize with a boycott. But plenty of other artists on the show have proven themselves to be hard working and full of talent. Personal favorites are Shane O'Neil whom I've admired for many years. James Vaughn, who even when confronted with applying a tattoo with two of the same foot took it in stride. And of course Jesse Smith, who stayed true to his own aesthetic and personality the whole route.

I'm not one to want TV exposure to gain fame. I did it more as a sound business move. I felt if I kept my mouth shut, stood up for what I believed in when challenged, and did good clean tattoos it would open up the market for me exponentially.

I work in a small town. Actual pieces that require me to be creative and fulfill my potential are few and far between. I end up doing a lot of cliche trendy images and smaller pieces due to low budgets or just lack of client creativity. I'm very thankful for the ample work flow I do have, I live like a king and I know it. But the chance to express myself more artistically and make good money at the same time is more ideal. I can only do so much reproductive work before I just feel like someone's tattoo slave. More a machine than an artist. The ones I feel an actual sense of pride and accomplishment for are few and far between.

Ill try again next season, and for any other show I can. I've done 4 episodes ( filmed 4. 2 have aired another will soon. One lies dead on the cutting room floor ) with Science Channels " Oddities " and it's done nothing but open doors for me. I've met tons of new collectors, scored tons of new pieces for my own hobby, made a few real friends, and had a great time.

TV has yet to show itself as the destructive force the masses tout it to be. So as long as it's a viable option for self promotion it will always be an opportunistic knock I answer.

The Audition: Ink Master season 3

On Thursday January 31st I woke up at 4:30 after around 3 hours of sleep.  My stomach was in knots and my head was in a fog. I got dressed, kissed my beloved Isabelle and said good bye to my creepy crypt.  I honestly got a little choked up.  I knew what I was doing could change the rest of my life.  Maybe it was just wishful thinking but the gravity of the situation was dawning on me.

A wind storm was tearing ass through Conmecticut.  A resin statue I keep on the back porch of Buddha had been pushed over with such force that it shattered in two.  I took this as a bad omen. 

Almost immediately this sign of impending turmoil began to manifest itself as reality.  I forgot my ID and had to run home after pumping gas.  Trees were down in the road and I was diverted from my normal route and made to be even later than I already was.  My very pregnant sister texted and said she was hospitalized with a kidney stone. A near and dear friend and fellow collector in Baltimore called me and said his house was almost broken into.  He went on his back porch only to come eye to eye through a glass door with a would be robber armed with a crowbar.  This whole morning was a mess.  

The last time I attempted NYC by train the rails were shut down and I was stranded on a track for an hour.   

I was convinced I was gonna get fucked out of this opportunity.  My anxiety was skyrocketing.  Stomach knots were twisting.  I was sucking on my inhaler like it was a lollipop.

And then it all kinda mellowed out.  Not a speck of traffic. I made great time.  Got a great parking spot in the garage.  Made the next train out with minutes to spare.  People were kind and held doors and pointed out money I dropped.  It was looking more and more positive by the minute.

The sunrise on the train was spectacular.  I watched it dance on the water and break through the shards of glass left in abandoned building window sills.  I got a reassuring calm and knew that no matter what,  I was doing something so many were afraid to do or just to stubborn to try.  I don't want to die knowing I could have attempted something that would change my life and never taken the risk.

I hopped a cab outside of grand central and zipped over to the small bar the audition was being held at.  I was an hour early and was still number 30 or so in line.  Artists kept pouring in after me.  I made a little small talk but no one was really that friendly.  Little surface shit.  I showed my portfolio to some cholo looking dudes with black and grey face tattoos.  Nice guys.  Said my stuff looked clean.  They were all the way from California.  I saw an artist who's work I really liked just a few people ahead of me. Wanted to say hello but didn't want to get out of line and cause any ruckus.  We tattoo artists aren't known for our forgiving nature and decorum when slighted. 

The door finally opens up and we all proceed like cattle to slaughter. Blindly winding up the steps.  This dude in front of me brought a giant art school portfolio.  The " look at me I'm an artist " type.   I think it's a shitty strategy.  More of an inconvenience to casting directors having to wait for him to break it all out.  It turns out it's an inconvenience to me too.  He's so oblivious to how huge this thing is and I actually have to stick and movie like Cassius Clay to avoid losing an eye.  Picture a 325 lb guy dancing on a tiny ass steal New York stair way.  If I slipped it woulda been a big fat snowball of beard and tattoo tumbling down ass over tea kettle, taking people out.

We all sign in.  Then wait to get called.  Three casting directors loom in the distance behind a paneled  glass wall.   Three artists line up at a time, and once a spot opens at a directors table,  one breaks off and shuffle in.  

I'm no stranger to casting interviews.  I was on a TLC show called " Help Wanted " where I competed to be the New Haven Raven's mascot.  I was militant straight edge at the time and went x-ed up all my facial piercings in wearing a BANE shirt or some other iconic image of the hardcore scene.  I never had to really audtion for " Oddities".  They like characters and encourage awkwardness on camera and take anyone.  My collection of dead things was credential enough.  Most recently me and Nathan Roberts, the Baltimore collector I mentioned earlier, attempted to get on top collector.  A team based antique purchasing competition.  We completed the camera interview but never got the call to film.  Heard the show kinda sucked anyways.  It's was all furniture crap, and while we could've probably held our own its far from our areas of expertise.

Back to the current audition, I finally get waved in to an attractive lady who's name evades me right now.  She's warm and welcoming.   I essentially  have 5 to 7 minutes to win her over and secure a call back.  I hand over my portfolio as we chit chat.  It's easy to talk to her.  Conversation flows easily.  We talk about my past TV experience.  My collection.  My recent internet run in with Kay Kutta, a past Ink Master competitor.  I caught Kay cross contaminating on the first episode of season 2.  I took to Instagram and called him out on it.  His response was less than intelligent.  He called me a " cock sucking groupie " and insisted I send him my girlfriend so he could fuck her.  Classy.  I let the director know I plan on flipping his table should I run into him at a convention.  She wrote down some info on a piece of paper and informed me I had an on camera interview at 1 PM the next day.  I was instructed to keep a straight face and walk out with out saying a word.   I put on my best poker face and worked my way through the crowd and couldn't wait to call Izzy and tell her the news

An Introduction of Sorts

I started this blog because I recently auditioned for Ink Master, which is a bit of a controversial action in the tattoo community.  I don't feel a need to explain myself to strangers, although I don't mind if they read this.  This was more intended as a read to any local artists, customers, friends or family,  who know me by more than just my name and might wonder why I would throw my name into the hat.  

I'm also on a few episodes of " Oddities ".  I have an ever expanding collection of macabre relics, and also go to great lengths to get new pieces.  Even if  " Ink Master " doesn't pan out I think those adventures will make for good reading. 

I swear.  I don't proof read good enough ( "well "enough you grammar nazis be damned ). I tend to poke fun at anything and everything.  If you can't handle it good luck on your journey and thanks for stopping by.